Persistence vs. Overbearance

Overbearance

Overbearance steals one's agency; it is forceful. Overbearance is selfish. Overbearance is thoughtlessness. Overbearance is unwise. Overbearance is trying too hard with little results. Overbearance leads to disappointment. Overbearance is controlling. Overbearance leads to heartache. Overbearance isn't understood by others.

Persistence

Persistence is fueled by love. Persistence is open-mindedness  Persistence is aggressive, but not overpowering. Persistence is creative. Persistence is consistent and enduring. Persistence is bold. Persistence is inspired. Persistence is righteous. Persistence is evenly balanced; it requires self-control. Persistence is smart and tactful. Persistence earns respect and trust. 

Blogging Spree: No Tengo Nada En Mente

These last few weeks (months, even) I have been in this whacky artsy and/or creative mood. And that may or may not explain all these blog posts that I have thrown out there recently. I dunno. It actually might not be all that artsy or creative. But I'll blog anyways. Why? Because I can. And I want to.

This time around, though...I really have no idea what I want to write. But I  have gained a great love for something called improvisation. Rather, I like to improvise and make things beautiful along the way. Don't get me wrong...I prefer to plan things out in advance and execute those plans exactly. And that's usually what I do with blog posts; I have a nice little plan of what will be written.

But not this one. It's coming out just as quick as I can type all these words. No plan whatsoever. The above picture is giving me an idea of what to write about, though. You see, I ran into this Slender look-alike while I was cruising along the Las Vegas strip. Las Vegas Boulevard, to be exact.

You might be wondering why I was there. Well, the simple answer is I had no choice; I had to go to the Belagio Gallery of Fine Art for an art assignment. And while I was out there on the strip, a sudden realization stuck me. "This is great. I have never been on the strip alone."

The truth is: It was an adventure, yes. But it only was an adventure because I got lost a handful of times. I won't go into detail, but I will say this...I am grateful for a lot of skills I learned as a missionary (i.e. speed walking, asking for directions, etc.) I was walking around like a blind cheetah; I was walking with haste, but I had no idea where I was or where I was going.

That adventure took place...well, yesterday. And now that I think about it...As awesome and fun as it was to be out there on that journey, it also kind of stunk. I was alone in an unfamiliar environment. I didn't have a friend, a sibling, or a companion to turn to. And that's what I am used to! I am almost never alone. I like figuring out crap myself. But when I can't figure it out, there's always that comfort that comes from knowing that I have a sibling, a parent, or a friend that I can turn to for answers.

But I simply love figuring out the crap; I love the adventure. And I think getting out there and being in unfamiliar environments is the key to growing and progressing.

A Confession, A Cure

Meet BDN-PC. He's my new laptop that I recently got with my scholarship money. Although he's a new friend, he and I have shared a joyful memory or two already. I love this piece of machinery.

However, I must confess that I was a little heart-broken when I realized that a good 50 GB of its 120 GB hard drive space has already been used up with the operating system, the programs, DROPBOX, and mission pictures.

The question haunted me for days: "What the devil is going to happen to my thousands of files of music?" You see, I personally own a good 30-40 GB of music. But with only 70 GB of HD space left, what was I to do with this crap load of beautiful music?

I decided that I was never going to listen to ALL 30-40 GB of that music. So I decided to tone it down and only put my favorite albums on this small piece of machinery. I began to transfer the music over wirelessly. But it was taking forever. And something didn't seem right.

A voice suddenly spoke to my mind. "Screw it. Spotify is the key."

It hit me like a sack-full of potatoes. I immediately deleted all the music from BDN-PC, and I downloaded and installed Spotify within a matter of 2-3 minutes (thanks to BDN-PC's quickness).

Spotify had everything I wanted to listen to (PLUS MORE!) as long as I had an Internet connection. It was love at first listen.

But little did I know that my love for Spotify could run even deeper. It all happened so quickly. In fact, it was about ten minutes ago (11:17 PM). I am sitting here waiting for my little brothers to call for a ride home from the Foothill vs. Basic game. And I have a huge urge to put on some Ben Folds Five.

I turn on the first album that catches my eye. The Unauthorized Biography Of Reinhold Messner is its name. And I am thinking, "This looks good."

Oh, it was blissful. The album started off with a tune called Narcolepsy. And I am thinking, "Okay, okay. Pretty good, pretty good." Before I knew it, I am hearing Don't Change Your Plans. Then Mess. And then Magic. By this moment, the tears are beginning to roll down my face.

"Beautiful music." I say to myself.

Then Hospital Song- A Cappella begins to play. I start to bawl.

And now I am rocking out to the some-what explicit Army while wiping those tears from my face one by one.

My confession is simple: I love Spotify. It's an antidote to BDN-PC's inability to hold my personal collection of music.

The Only True Church, Personal Revelation

Another General Conference of The Church of Jesus Christ has come to a quick close. As always, I am left thinking, "Darn. It's already over? How could it possibly be so?"

A lot of other things have been on my mind, too, of course. It may have something to do with all the wonderful talks and words that were heard all across the world. So many simple truths have been taught and learned these past two days. And I am simply overwhelmed by how much these past two days have helped me spiritually. I am beyond grateful to belong to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. I know it is Christ's church. It's His, and there is no other.

That simple truth and belief of ours is found in the Fifth and Sixth Article of Faith:

5 We believe that a man must be called of God, by prophecy, and by the laying on of hands by those who are in authority, to preach the Gospel and administer in the ordinances thereof.

6 We believe in the same organization that existed in the Primitive Church, namely, apostles, prophets, pastors, teachers, evangelists, and so forth.

A man must be called of God. He must be given the authority, the keys to preside over Christ's church. This is nothing new. We saw it again and again and again in the Old Testament in prophets such as Moses and in Abraham. They were entitled to know God's will for all of His children. They talked to God and received revelation straight from Him.

It is no different today. As Latter-Day Saints, we believe in a latter-day prophet who receives revelations straight from the Lord. We saw that this weekend when President Monson announced the new, younger age requirements for Elders (now 18) and Sisters (now 19). How awesome is it to recognize and know that such an announcement didn't come by chance? It is the Lord's will. We may not quite yet understand why the Lord needs these slightly-younger missionaries, but I can assure the world that there is a purpose behind it. It's not because "it makes more sense" or "it's more convenient"; otherwise, it would have been this way a long time ago. The Lord needs more missionaries, and He needs these younger Elders and Sisters.

Aside from the revelation that our prophet receives for us as God's children, I am grateful for the personal revelation that each of us can receive be listening to conference. As I listened to Elder Holland speak earlier today, he said something along the lines of (referring to being a true disciple of Jesus Christ), "The call is to come, to stay true, to love God, and lend a hand. I include in that call to fixed faithfulness every return missionary who ever stood in a baptismal font, and with arm to the square said, 'Having been commissioned of Jesus Christ...' That commission was to have changed your convert forever. But it was surely supposed to have changed you forever as well."

When I heard those words come out of Elder Holland's mouth, I couldn't help but start to tear up. It was a reminder to me that I need to do a better job of being a disciple of Christ. I wasn't only meant to be affected by my mission during the two years that I served. I am meant to let those baptisms and those mission experiences continue to change me.

I want to be a faithful Christian soldier. I cannot and will not stop--no matter the price.

The Dreams That Will Haunt You

I have absolutely sucked at this blogging thing as of late. Heck, I have struggled since returning home from my mission. I am just not as creative anymore. Well, I wasn't. I feel like a lot of good ideas for some blog entries have been popping into my mind as of late.

It's a miracle that I am even here writing this. My choices were as follows: cut my hair, sleep, watch the re-run of the BYU vs. Hawaii game (which I attended with my good friend Megan Marie Shill), or...blog. And I chose to blog. Why? Because I feel like the cyber world has been lacking the BDN love that is scattered about through the writings of this blog.

My simple, late-night thought is this: I dream a lot. And I dream a lot of crap. It's great! My dreams are always entertaining--even if they happen to be the most bizarre things to ever enter my brilliant mind. Some of my dreams come true. Some of my dreams come half true. Some of my dreams are incorrectly analyzed; others are over-analyzed. Each is unique, and I believe they all serve a purpose.

My favorite kind of dreams, though, are the ones that will haunt me. That sounds a little strange. But let me elaborate. I don't mean a nightmare or a bad dream. Perhaps haunt isn't even the right word. (Oh well. It sounds more dramatic.) When I say "haunt"...I really mean the unbelievably awesome/unreal dreams that will never leave you alone. They never vanish; they cannot be erased. And it's not a bad thing. It's like that because we cherish those dreams, and we never want to forget them.

For example, as a veteran missionary in Chile, I dreamed a dream that will never be forgotten. I won't go into detail because to me it was very personal and even sacred. But I will say that it opened my eyes and helped me gain a better understanding of a sliver of the Plan of Salvation. That dream will definitely "haunt" me for the rest of my days.

When I napped earlier today, I had a dream that will "haunt" me for a while, methinks. It was unbelievably random, but it was real. And while it was so real and unforgettable, I don't even think I could explain it in words if I had to. But in the dream I just remember being surrounded by some of the people I love most. There were smiles; there were laughs. And the dream was an instant reminder that I am who I am thanks to these beautiful people.

Yeah, it sounds silly, but my favorite dreams haunt me. And they always will.